I wasn't going to post this link, but....

http://betsylerner.com/2010/01/31/and-the-moon-rose-over-an-open-field/

Sorry for the caption beneath the picture.  (Shoot. Now you're all going to read it when you might have skipped it....).

But the blog post itself is really good if you want to understand the brain of a writer.

This is why I posted the link: "I think one of the worst parts of being a writer is trying to appear normal. Especially at grown-up gatherings such as holidays, dinner parties, gallery openings." and this: "I want to understand how it is that being by myself with my keyboard is when I feel least alone. Not connected to others, per se. I’ve never understood writers who say they write to help other people. ... I write to feel normal." 

Tonight, I TOTALLY felt that. 

I went to Relief Society Enrichment night and there were not a lot of people there, so there was no way to just sit and listen and blend in. And I was once again reminded of how weird I am. It's not that I'm a little off center. It's that I'm on a different line than everyone else.

Okay, not EVERYONE else. That's the thing I actually like about this ward. It just so happens that a whole bunch of computer programmers and engineers (like the kind who develop stuff for the CIA....that kind of brilliant) live in the ward. And it also happens that they married appropriately bright women. And (here's the joyous thing for me) those women happened to be unique in that an abnormally high percentage of them are intensely creative--musicians and writers and artists.  This is the only ward I've lived in where I feel like I have legitimate, honest-to-goodness friends, who may think I'm weird but like me anyway (even if they all are probably a little more conventional than I am).

It also just so happens that none of them came tonight. (There was one lady there who is an expert quilter, and she and I get along just fine. So it wasn't ALL awkward.)

I came home remembering why I used to say (frequently), "If I have babysitting for the night, why would I spend it away from my husband? Even if he's out of town, if you're going to watch my kids, I'm not going to go socialize with a bunch of women. I'm going to go write."