Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Things I want my kids to know: Parenthood

The prophets used to openly teach that people should have a large family (without defining what that meant).  They used to teach that dads should support the family and moms should be stay-at-home, full time parents because raising kids is important enough that someone should be doing it full time.

You don't hear that so much anymore. I'm not sure why. Rumor has it that people stopped listening and rejected that advice, even in the church, so they stopped teaching it. I know it's impossible for families with only one parent, but it was never actually "revoked" for the rest of us.

But the reality is that women don't really want to stay home with their kids. It's too hard and the rewards are highly delayed, to a great extent.

But I want my kids to know that I tried it. And being a parent the way they used to teach you really works and is a good thing. It's not a waste of a woman's time or talents to be a stay at home mother. It's not belittling or degrading or a trap.

It's wonderful. Best thing I could have done with my mind and talents and education and experience and time and money.

And having a lot of kids is hard work, but it's wonderful, too. Well worth it.

I am so glad I followed that "old" advice. It's a good choice I never would have made without the prophets telling me it was a good choice.

The pressure is on, against moms and dads and the old-fashioned way of doing things. It's so strong against stay-at-home parents that many women don't even consider that an option. They don't think they can be "fulfilled".

I still remember the guy who told us, "Well, my wife likes to contribute to our family."  As if creating and raising the family isn't a contribution?

Besides, you can always have a job later. But you can't always have babies later.

So do it the way the prophets say. They know what they're talking about. You'll be glad.

(And no, I'm not going to tell you how many kids you should have either...)

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