Sunday, December 11, 2011

I don't want to miss it.

Robert Downey, Jr., said, "“It’s so easy in life to get caught up with the ‘now I am in a good spot, now I am in a bad spot’ but the thing is to turn it up to 110 degrees and stir slowly. I don’t want to miss what is actually happening.” http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2011/12/10/robert-downey-jr-embarrassed-that-his-wife-watched-him-cross-dress/?intcmp=trending#ixzz1gDBtOw64

I need to remember that. I don't want to miss what is actually happening.

A few weeks ago, Nathanael insisted he wanted to come to the store with me. So I put him in the car and while we drove, I tried to have a conversation with my 2 year old.  "What's your favorite thing to do, Nathie?" I asked him.

"Come to the store with you," he replied. And that was that. No matter how much I asked him other things, reworded my thoughts, tried to figure out his favorite things to do, he insisted his favorite thing was to sit in his car seat and drive to the store--which is exactly what we were doing.

It hit me that a 2 year old lives in the moment. What we're doing right now is either the best, most desirable thing, or it's not and we throw a fit until it changes. 

Later, when we were coming home, he was tired and told me his favorite thing would be to get out of the car and never go shopping again.

I thought about that for a long time--what he was doing right now is his favorite thing.

I decided I could learn a lot from that--like RD,jr. said, "I don't want to miss what is actually happening." On the other hand, it's a good thing to live outside the moment, too. Someone has to plan ahead, make decisions based on the greatest possible good, and respond in a thoughtful way. Living in the moment has its advantages, but avoiding knee-jerk reactions and always responding instead of acting are two of the not among them.  Maybe that's why 2 year olds throw fits--side effect of being stuck in the moment, either loving it or hating it but nothing in between. 

But living so that you don't miss what is actually happening, here and now, well that sounds like a good idea.

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