This is a must read

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kristin-neff/self-compassion_b_843721.html

I think the analysis here is good. Self-compassion is a great concept. I'd probably also add that the right approach to life seems to be not to have self-esteem, but to forget yourself and get to work. Lose yourself to find yourself. And also to get some understanding of God's love for you. That matters more than you loving yourself, than esteeming yourself highly, than being right or special. But certainly to stop competing with the world to be better and instead settle in to having compassion for yourself (instead of having to be perfect all the time) is a great start.

Tim noted once that when singers have a need to hear themselves, to constantly check their own performances, they often end up singing out of tune because it helps them pick their own voices out of the mix if they're a little sharp.

I think people do that in general. When you're so concerned about how you look to others, how you are coming across, and if you measure up to a standard you've concocted for yourself, you end up out of tune.

Beautiful singing doesn't come from more attention to yourself in performance. It comes from trusting yourself and giving your all to your audience.

I've often had to remind myself that God doesn't need heroes and martyrs. Not from most of us. Mostly he needs masses of people who are obedient. He needs us to forget ourselves and get to work--not on ourselves, but on helping other people be happy, on serving their needs (not our own), on HIS work. And that makes us happy. (So does that mean that forgetting ourselves is the most selfish decision we can make? I think it does.).

So this was a great article, reminding me to stop thinking about me so much and start being kind to myself.