Joseph Smith says.....(Quotes from Minutes from Early RS Meetings)

" it is natural for females to have feelings of charity—  you are now plac’d in a situation where you can act according  to those sympathies which God has planted in your bosoms.  If you live up to these principles how great and glorious!—  if you live up to your privileges, the angels cannot be restrain’d  from being your associates— females, if they are pure and innocent  can come into the presence of God; for what is more pleasing to God than innocence; you must be innocent or you cannot come  up before God. If we would come before God let us be pure  ourselves. The devil has great power— he will so transform  things as to make one gape at those who are doing the will  of God— You need not be tearing men for their deeds,  but let the weight of innocence be felt; which is more mighty than a millstone hung about the neck. Not war,  not jangle, not contradiction, but meekness, love, purity, these  are the things that should magnify us.— ... If you will be pure, nothing can hinder.

After this instruction, you will be responsible for  your own sins. It is an honor to save yourselves— all are  responsible to save themselves."

http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#35

"...Let this Society teach how to act towards husbands  to treat them with mildness and affection. When a man is  borne down with trouble— when he is perplex’d, if he can meet  a smile, an argument— if he can meet with mildness, it will  calm down his soul and soothe his feelings. When the mind  is going to despair, it needs a solace."
http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#37

"...When you go home never give a cross  word, but let kindness, charity and love, crown your works  henceforward. Don’t envy sinners— have mercy on them.  God will destroy them.— Let your labors be confin’d most ly to those around you in your own circle; as far as knowledge  is concerned, it may extend to all the world, but your  administrations, should be confin’d to the circle of your  immediate acquaintance, and more especially to the  members of the Society." http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#37

"One request to the Prest. and Society,  that you search yourselves— the tongue is an unruly  member— hold your tongues about things of no moment, — a little tale will set the world on fire. At this time  the truth on the guilty should not be told openly— Strange  as this may seem, yet this is policy. "
http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#49

"To the iniquitous show yourselves  merciful. I am advis’d by some of the heads of the  church to tell the Relief Society to be virtuous— but  to save the church from desolation and the sword  beware, be still, be prudent. Repent, reform but do  it in a way to not destroy all around you. I do not  want to cloak iniquity— all things contrary to the will [p. 52] of God, should be cast from us, but dont do more hurt  than good with your tongues— be pure in heart— Jesus  designs to save the people out of their sins. Said Jesus  ye shall do the work which ye see me do. These are the grand key words for the Society to act upon.
If I were not in your midst to aid and council  you, the devil would overcome you. I want the innocent  to go free— rather spare ten iniquitous among you than  than condemn one innocent one. “Fret not thyself because  of evil doers.” God will see to it." http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#49

"Supposing that Jesus Christ and angels should object  to us on frivolous things, what would become of us? We  must be merciful and overlook small things." http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#58

"Nothing is so much calculated to lead people to  forsake sin as to take them by the hand and watch over them  with tenderness. When persons manifest the least kindn ess and love to me, O what pow’r it has over my mind,  while the opposite course has a tendency to harrow up all  the harsh feelings and depress the human mind." http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#59

" if you would have God have mercy on you, have mercy on one another." http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#59


"We must walk  uprightly all day long— How glorious are the principles  of righteousness! We are full of selfishness—  the devil flatters us that we are very righteous, while we  are feeding on the faults of others— We can only live by  worshipping our God— all must do it for themselves—  none can do it for another. How mild the Savior  dealt with Peter, saying “when thou art converted, stren gthen thy brethren”— at an other time he said to him  “lovest thou me? ‘Feed my sheep.”— If the sisters  love the Lord let them feed the sheep and not destroy  them. "

"The way to keep all the saints  together and keep the work rolling, is to wait with  all long suff’ring till God shall bring such characters  to justice. There should be no license for sin, but  mercy should go hand in hand with reproof.

Sisters of this Society, shall there be strife among  you? I will not have it— you must repent and get  the love of God. Away with selfrighteousness. The  best measure or principle to bring the poor to repentance  is to administer to their wants— the Society is not only  to relieve the poor, but to save souls."   http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#60

"Altho’ I do wrong, I do  not the wrongs that I am charg’d with doing— the wrong  that I do is thro’ the frailty of human nature like  other men. No man lives without fault. Do you  think that even Jesus, if he were here would be with out fault in your eyes? They said all manner of [p. 80] evil against him— they all watch’d for iniquity." http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#77

" The servants  of the Lord are required to guard against those things  that are calculated to do the most evil— the little foxes  spoil the vines— little evils do the most injury to the  church. If you have evil feelings and speak of them  to one another, it has a tendency to do mischief— these  things result in those evils which are calculated to  cut the throats of the heads of the church.

When I do the best I can— when I am accompl ishing the greatest good, then the most evils are got up  against me. I would to God that you would be wise.

I now counsel you, if you know anything, hold your  tongues, and the least harm will be done." http://beta.josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/nauvoo-relief-society-minute-book#78