Did I just read that?

From the NY Times:

"Acorn to Stand Trial in Nevada Case"


What was the crime, failing to grow into an oak?

Did I just read that?

"Blog Writers Wanted - Consistent Work - No Experience Necessary in Las Vegas - (Las Vegas) <<creative gigs"


Experience outside Las Vegas, however, is mandatory.

Did I just read that?

from Las Vegas Craigslist:
"Actors audition for new parts - (lv) <<talent gigs"


Clever new way to avoid plastic surgery?

AWESOME homeschool article

http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2009/09/28/confessions_homeschooler/

This one just got better:

From google news:
Including that picture and the short excerpt just made it all more laughable! We don't eat enough vegetables that look at you? We don't eat enough Veggie Tales Characters? Veggie Tales Characters are being watched by the Center for Disease Control?

TopNews United States

Eating in America Still Unhealthy: CDC

U.S. News & World Report - ‎Sep 29, 2009‎

TUESDAY, Sept. 29 (HealthDay News) -- Most Americans don't eat the recommended amounts of fruits and vegetables, says a US government study released Tuesday.

Control

I have always taken these verses of scripture (from D&C 121) to be a guide to my parenting (sorry for the lengthy quote):

"36 That the ^arights of the priesthood are inseparably connected with the powers of heaven, and that the powers of heaven cannot be ^bcontrolled nor handled only upon the ^cprinciples of righteousness.

  37 That they may be conferred upon us, it is true; but when we undertake to ^acover our ^bsins, or to gratify our ^cpride, our vain ambition, or to exercise control or ^ddominion or compulsion upon the souls of the children of men, in any degree of unrighteousness, behold, the heavens ^ewithdraw themselves; the Spirit of the Lord is grieved; and when it is withdrawn, Amen to the priesthood or the authority of that man.

  38 Behold, ere he is aware, he is left unto himself, to ^akick against the pricks, to ^bpersecute the saints, and to ^cfight against God.

  39 We have learned by sad experience that it is the ^anature and disposition of almost all men, as soon as they get a little ^bauthority, as they suppose, they will immediately begin to exercise ^cunrighteous dominion.

  40 Hence many are called, but ^afew are chosen.

  41 No ^apower or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the ^bpriesthood, only by ^cpersuasion, by ^dlong-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned;

  42 By ^akindness, and pure ^bknowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the ^csoul without ^dhypocrisy, and without ^eguile—

  43 ^aReproving betimes with ^bsharpness, when ^cmoved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of ^dlove toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy;

  44 That he may know that thy faithfulness is stronger than the cords of ^adeath.

  45 Let thy ^abowels also be full of charity towards all men, and to the household of faith, and let ^bvirtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy ^cconfidence wax strong in the ^dpresence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distil upon thy soul as the ^edews from heaven.

  46 The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant ^acompanion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of ^brighteousness and truth; and thy ^cdominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever." 

 

So when Daniel started a new phase this week, I didn't quite know how to jump. See, he called my bluff. His latest claim is, "You can't control me. You can't control anything."

 

Each time he said it, part of me wanted to assert my authority as mother. Another part of me heard that verse, quoted above, running through my head, "exercise control or ^ddominion or compulsion upon the souls of the children of men, in any degree of unrighteousness, behold, the heavens ^ewithdraw themselves; the Spirit of the Lord is grieved;" 

Really, he's right. I can't control him. I can't control anything. 

 

And you know what? 

 

I don't even want to. 

 

I've just wondered if he is old enough and mature enough to understand the implications of what he has grasped--that if I don't control him, HE has to; that obeying is not the same as being controlled; that "when we obtain any ^ablessing from God, it is by ^bobedience to that law upon which it is predicated." (D&C 130:21).   

 

Can a 4-year-old understand that when NOBODY is in control (including our own selves), chaos and unhappiness ensue? Can he understand that we have rules to benefit us? Can he understand that when I say, "Go potty and get in bed", I'm not trying to control his soul, but merely trying to help the whole family run smoothly for everyone's benefit? Can he understand that Tim and I have always made it a point to allow EVERYTHING in our family to be up for negotiation--but he has to be able to negotiate, not yell and storm out? Can he grasp that teaching isn't the same as controlling? And that it is my responsibility to teach him, and that I have been given specific instructions by God (Mosiah 4) in regards to the stewardship he has granted me over his children (who are also now my children)? Can he see that God also gives us instructions, and we can choose not to follow them, but it doesn't lead to joy and peace in our lives?

I suppose I ought to sit down with him sometime when he hasn't been yelling, "You can't control anything!" and talk to him about it.

I think I also need to deal with the core issues in his life, which seem to be a sense of insecurity (and no wonder, with us unsure of when and where we will land more permanently, waiting for job applications and auditions to settle out one way or the other, and Tim gone on tour!). In fact, he looked at me tonight and said, "You can't control anything. Because Grandma is in charge of you and SHE is the one who can control things." How's that for insecurity--he is trying to sort out the fact that the ultimate authorities in his life actually bow to a greater authority? (How does that work and how does he fit into the new order of things?) Understanding this concept will help him understand a relationship with God, but is a 4 year old mature enough to grasp willingly stepping aside to a greater authority--without losing any of your own? Or that my relationship with his Grandma is founded on respect and love, willing obedience, service (both ways), and honor, not Grandma CONTROLLING everything?

 

He also came in the other day and said, "I'm smarter than Anda, right Mom?" And I said, "I don't know about that. She's smart and you're smart, but I don't think either of you is smarter." "No," he replied. "I'm smarter." "You are smarter in some things, I'm sure. And she's smarter than you in some things. God made us that way so we would need each other." Anda was standing right there, by the way. Dan looked at me and shook his head. "I'm smarter than Anda, and I'm smarter than you, too," he replied firmly.

See? Plenty of hints that I have a child in crisis. He's reached that age when he is big enough to understand and choose things for himself. He's self-aware. He's starting 1st grade, so he's getting lots of good educational challenges that he's succeeding at (pretty good for a guy who just turned 4!). But there is lots of instability in our lives right now--lots of chaos, lots of people all the time who do things different than I do and are still happy, lots of mommy not running the show....

I think it's time for Mommy to swoop down not with greater bossiness and insistence, not with a good beating and more firmness in the rules, but with lots of hugs, love, listening, talking, hearing what he has to say, good meals, snuggling, praise, attention, and reassurance.  And also with a greater measure of good-old-fashioned grown up respect, a little more responsibility, and some added freedom wherever he can get it.

Daniel is in what I call the "verges"--one of those ages where he is in a gap between two worlds--in his case, between toddlerhood and childhood--and those times are hard for kids (others include age 2--between baby and toddler, age 12-13--between child and teenager, etc.).  Those are the times when the children are suddenly ready for more freedom, and when parents are caught off guard and don't know if their child is ready. Those are the times of conflict, frustration, fighting, and establishing new patterns of interaction. 

In other words, they're times when the kids are ready to grow up. 

And we, as parents, have to strike that gentle balance between letting them grow and loving them through it.

Homeschooling Resource Recommendation

Netflix.

It's a great resource for homeschoolers.

How can a movie service be useful for homeschoolers?

Sign up for their basic package (about $10/month), and you get access to hundreds of "Instant play" movies online, including bunches of educational children's programming (LOVE "Cyberchase"--teaches math skills, problem solving, and working together) and tons of documentaries.  TONS of them. All that play instantly on your computer or TV (here, the TV is set up as a second screen for the computer, so we play stuff through the computer onto the TV). Also, we can watch a lot of the movies that go with the books we've been reading ("Princess Bride" anyone?), which is both fun and educational, along with classic films.

So now, to supplement our Language Arts, Arts/Music, Science, and Social Studies curricula, we're watching documentaries on mammals, mayan linguistics, history, jazz, etc. Fun fun stuff. I love NOVA, and now we can have it instantly, any time of day or night, to add to what we're learning.

What Daniel Did in the Lions' Den

After hearing the story of the prophet Daniel in the lion's den, my son Daniel said, "Do you know what I was playing with those lions? Fetch. And Checkers. And then Throw the Imaginary Bad Guy."

Did I just read that?

from craigslist las vegas:
"We are 3 ex-pro players ( Guitarist, Bassist and Drummer) looking for a Vocalist WITH YOUR OWN EQUIPMENT to join us."

And how does a vocalist NOT have their own equipment? Not like they can just put their instrument down and forget it somewhere.

Math Answers, by Caleb

Trying to get Caleb to do math can be tricky. He gets intolerably bored, he says.

So today I guess he tried to spice things up. I found these as answers (all correct, btw) on his assignment when he was finished:

16-8=*
("Doing a code here, mom. Just use shift to figure it out.")

17-9= @77@(|<
("It says 'attack.'")

5-2= #07
("It says 'hot'")

11-7=$30

5-4=yeek! a tower!

4-2=@pp73
("Apple")

8-5= #0r53

9-6=#00#00

d. C's answer

9. $one less than a hundred

14. 9 (hooray for TNR!)

("That's Times New Roman, Mom.")

Did I just read that?

"Eating in America Still Unhealthy: CDC

U.S. News & World Report - ‎7 hours ago‎" (from google news)

What do they want us to do, NOT eat in America?

What's new?

I have been an inconsistent blogger lately.

And now Caleb is hanging around waiting to write on his blog, so this will be just a short update.

We won't have any news about the Sing Off audition/casting process until the show speaks publicly. Even if Tim were to hear, the audition application included a nondisclosure clause, so he can't even say if his groups got cut. So that's a little anxiety-provoking for me. Rumor is that people who get onto the show have to move to LA for a month. If that's the case, it brings up a minefield of issues for me--like what about the other 6 of us? But we won't know until it's yet another rush job. Naturally. I never move easy.

Meanwhile, Tim is leaving on a double tour on Tuesday--off to Vegas, home for literally ONE day, and then off to Colorado and Wyoming with moosebutter. 10 days total, split in the middle. He'll miss our anniversary (which is no big deal--we both missed it last year simply because we both forgot). He'll be home for my birthday.

Then, for the rest of the year, he'll probably be in and out, here one week, gone the next.

So that's us lately.

I'm antsy to start writing. Kids are having a BALL playing in the plowed fields (digging up old toys, dozens of golf balls, miscellaneous broken metal things, rocks, marbles, etc), picking the overabundant produce (plums, peaches, grapes, blackberries, gages....). Loving the fall weather. Glad we're not in Vegas, although that might change when we hit the cold front next week!

Did I just read that?

from craigslist las vegas:

"MAIL SINGER LOOKING TO FORM COUNTRY MUSIC BAND !!! ....NO FLAKE'S OR DRUNK'S DRINKING OK KNOW YOU'R LIMIT'S "

Is this like a Mail Bride? A Mail Singer? Or does he just sing the stuff the US Post Office brings, country style? And is it okay to have drunks who aren't drinking? And what are all those apostrophes doing hanging out in there? Maybe they were drinking.

Did I just read that?

From "Ghosts: True Encounters With the World Beyond: Haunted Places, Haunted Houses, Haunted People" (yes, the book has TWO subtitles), a grotesquely oversized book (758 pages, 8x11",  all filled in double columns of 11-point type), by Hans Holzer.

On  page 169, in the midst of the description of their arrival at a site Holzer claims is Camelot (even though his own medium reported it was a monastery of some kind called "Gwainelod") we get this gem: "There we were, Catherine in a wine red pants suit, the driver somewhere by himself looking down into the village, and Sybil and I trying to tune in the past."

What does a wine red pants suit have to do with anything? And if the driver was "somewhere by himself" then how can he be included in "there we were?" And, for all you grammar geeks out there, that "Sybil and I" in the last part of the sentence is debatable--shouldn't it be "Sybil and me"? (It should run parallel to "There we were, Bob eating ice cream and me eating pickles.")

Then, on page 174, describing a strip-tease joint in London, he says, "It isn't the place to take your maiden aunt, but you can take your wife. The last time I visited..., I was somewhat startled by the completely nude bartenders, female, popping up behind the bar of the upstairs club...." (emphasis in the original).

So THAT'S the kind of place you take your wife?  Funny, strip tease clubs are not high on my list of places wives generally like to be taken. In fact, they aren't generally known as a place you take any kind of date. What does he think men are there for--the conversation?

Did I just read that?

I found this box in my mother's pantry and snapped a quick photo of it. I'm not sure I need to say anything else about it except that we had a good laugh. This is NOT a photoshopped image (you can tell by the quality). That's really the word that appears on the real box.

New Ice Cream Complaint

So I complained a couple months ago about the shrinking ice cream boxes.

Now there's a new ice cream racket.

See, about a year ago this "less than a dollar a box" product appeared in the ice cream section of the store. It was "frozen dairy dessert". Of course, being a cheapskate, I tried it. The kids loved it, and Tim and I thought it was fine. Not so rich as ice cream, but sweet and...fine. And cheap. It came in only the basic chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry flavors. Since the main ingredient was skim milk instead of cream, I assume it was cheaper to produce and (though I never checked) a little higher in sugar to counter for the lower in fat.

So now we have ice cream companies trying to pass it off as ice cream and trying not to tell you they sold you a non-cream product.

For example, Dreyer's Loaded. It's NOT ice cream. It's frozen dairy dessert, with the first listed ingredient in some flavors not even milk--it's whey (a byproduct from the cheese-making process). But it looks like ice cream and the "frozen dairy dessert" label is so small it's almost invisible on the extremely busy ice cream box.

Nutritionally, it's not the same. For example, the Double Fudge Brownie ice cream has 20 carbs, 7g fat, and 3 proteins per half cup. The "Loaded" Double Fudge Brownie Frozen Dairy Dessert has 23 carbs, 5 g fat, and only 2 proteins per half cup. There is the issue of whether skim milk or cream is actually more likely to make you gain weight. (There are studies out there indicating that children who drink whole milk are less likely to gain weight than children who drink skim or 2% milk. Some people think it's because skim milk removes the fat but leaves the milk sugars). And whey is supposed to increase insulin production, so it will hit your body different than cream does. Not to mention the fact that it's "LOADED" with extra carbs to counter the lack of richness from missing the cream.

Of course, this isn't healthy food anyway, so what does it matter?

And it does taste good, although without that rich creaminess that ice cream has.

Just be aware when you set out to buy ice cream--some kinds have more sugar than others, and some kinds have more fat, and some aren't even ice cream. You have to read the box.

See, I'm not the only one who thinks insurance companies are evil

http://money.cnn.com/2009/09/24/news/economy/healthcare_obama_doctor/index.htm?cnn=yes

Did I just read that?

This is from a really sad story about a toddler who died. The problem?

"It crashed onto the child, killing her. Her 17-year-old parents were performing CPR on her when police arrived.

The fire department took the little girl to a local hospital, where she later died." http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,555161,00.html?loomia_ow=t0:s0:a16:g2:r5:c0.155624:b27939384:z0

She died twice.

Today's Minor Victories

1. Best bubble bath I've ever drawn for the kids. We had no "bubble stuff" so I squirted a couple teaspoons of baby shampoo into the water while it was running. Lots of big, fluffy, long-lasting bubbles. Downside was the same as other bubble bath--how do you rinse it off when it's in the water?

2.  Everyone did school today. And when Tim sent me into time out when I got frustrated during a math lesson (kindly), I actually calmed down, thought of a different way to teach it, and jumped back into the fray. Success!

3. Dinner was both made and eaten by 6/7 of the family. Hamburgers go on the "fix it again" list.

4. I reminded myself that something that was hanging over me, causing fear and trepidation, was speculation, not coming at me right away, and not even necessarily going to come at me--and I managed to calm down, cheer up, and forget about it!

5.  While I didn't manage to say no, I didn't let a really persuasive saleman get me to say yes, either, despite the fact that I was working in my worst medium--over the phone. I do much better by email or speaking in person. I don't much like talking to machines.

6. I helped harvest peaches and dealt with the ones that were on the edge of spoiling.

7. I made time to "rest" on the hammock with all three little boys--something Benjamin values above almost all else.

8. I walked in a field holding hands with my love and talked with him about what was in my heart--joys and fears.

9. I watched a tractor and plow working with Daniel and we actually spent time observing and discussing it.

10. I made bread.

11. I didn't lose my temper when someone peed on MY bed.

Family Home Evening

Tonight, we threw together another family home evening. Being a kind of loosely-structured, creative family, we don't usually remember to plan FHE in advance, but we usually manage to have it anyway.

Here's how it went:

Well, we started at 2:00 am, interrupting Caleb's math lesson so that we could get to FHE before Tim had to start his evening's work (We're prepping to record no less than a dozen all-vocal albums. No joke. And still digging for gigs, arranging music, and all that other stuff Tim does all the time. Not to mention he picked up 4 more very interesting projects today that we're both intrigued by and excited about.)

First, we had an opening song ("Popcorn Popping") and then an opening song ("ABC") and then started an opening song ("I Am a Child of God").

Then we had the opening prayer.

So far so good.

Then there was some debate about who was going to give the lesson. Daniel wanted to teach a "music lesson" that somehow involved him banging on a little toy piano. Anda wanted everyone to be taught a lesson on how to cut apples into squares. Tim had a stack of church magazines in his lap and an idea for a lesson that was for real. Tim eventually got to start teaching. He gave everyone a magazine and we talked about what kinds of things God wants us to learn about, how we can learn about those things, what prophets do, and where else we can get God's word (like the scriptures!). It was a great lesson, which the kids were thoroughly involved in and I participated in as much as I could, including defining "stretching a dollar", while I dealt with the potatoes that were just done boiling right then.

Then Anda went to grab apples and knives (we talked her out of it), Daniel started banging the piano (we talked him out of it), Benji and Dan begged to taste the potatoes (which they did), and then we settled back down for the closing song and prayer.

Then we had a closing song (I think it was "ABC" again) and another closing song ("We are a Happy Family") and another closing song, all at the top of the kids' lungs, concluding with "Love at Home," Dan's favorite (and also delivered at the loudest volume the kids could muster), and interrupted with a lengthy quote from "Blues Clues" by Benjamin (a good part of it in Benjamese) starting with "A clue! A Clue! I see a clue!" and which he was frustrated I was unable to take the "other part" of--all because he noticed that there was a pawprint on Daniel's Blues Clues shorts. Then Tim took the second part of the Blues Clues dialogue, and sang a bit of the mailbox song from Blues Clues (which sent Benji careening around the house singing the rest and doing the dance while he ran).

When Benji finished, Caleb said a nice closing prayer.

Then everyone kind of drifted away, talking about the "activity" (which we always drift away discussing and never actually have) while I went in to finish dinner.

Thoroughly happy, I wondered aloud to Tim if the person who wrote Love at Home ever had kids. Where are the songs celebrating the joyful, noisy chaos of a family having fun and learning together? Whoever said a happy family consists of peaceful, quiet, churchlike atmosphere must have abused their children because healthy, happy kids aren't like that! And I don't think they should be.

I love having a big family!

I realize most families plan a little better, have FHE charts to make sure everyone gets turns to do something each week (instead of doing it like we do, where everyone gets turns to do all of whatever they like each week), do an organized activity, have a snack, have a reverent and quiet lesson. I kinda suspect most families don't sing "Twinkle Star" multiple times for both songs every week for two years.

I don't regret the way we do it, though. Our kids love family home evening. It works for our family, in all its chaotic, unplanned, by-the-seat-of-our-pants, noisy "structure". It's fun. When we forget, the kids literally pray that Mom and Dad won't forget family home evening next week. Nobody complains when we call it's time for FHE. It's short. It's fun. We learn a lot and laugh a lot and love a lot.

And isn't that what it's about?